Make It Dirty

We fuck because we are fucked. We feel fucked over. Raw. Fucking angry. “Dirty,” she said. One word and a look. Her head tilted slightly down, her eyes looking up at me to make me feel taller. These are not conscious or practiced moments. Everything is instinct.

We had just left a party we were anxious to ditch. A work party. Mostly straight people. Bad appetizers and shitty rum drinks. No one on the dance floor. We left after wandering around and chatting with enough people to be polite. I don’t think we stayed more than half an hour. I hate small talk. I get jumpy. Thank god we didn’t have to stay longer. I never like straight parties, but right now, with the tragedy of the election, I really can’t stand to be in a room full of people like that. White, rich, entitled, and wanting to care about what’s going on but enjoying the comfortable assurance that it doesn’t really affect them. They don’t feel the damage and all the fucked up bullshit that so many of us do. I was angry walking out of there. Hurt and angry.

“Let’s go,” she said and I grabbed her arm as we headed out the door. I felt her move towards the car as we neared it but I tightened my grip and kept walking. I was heading towards the water, the graffiti, the warehouses. I walked quickly, silent, wanting to be in the dark, wanting brick and not this shiny glass and steel that surrounded us. I stopped where it was dark enough, quiet enough. We slipped between two buildings. I put her hands against the wall.

Power. Give me the power in this moment. Let me be bigger, stronger, more capable. Let me position you and shove your legs open with my knee. Let me be in control now, baby. Give it to me.

hot girl in a fuzzy coatShe’s wearing a fuzzy jacket that I like to pet with my fingers. Her hair is newly cut short, almost too short for me to grab, it slips through my fingers. I want her scalp to come alive and feel me. I pull and tug. She moans and closes her eyes. Her head falls back into my grip. I hold her still, my left arm crooked behind her back, holding her hair while my other hand pets her slowly. I start with my fingertips on her forehead and slowly drag my hand across her face, teasing her lips, scratching a bit at her neck, tracing her collar bone, sliding over and down her tits, grabbing at her belly, shifting over to her hips, her thighs, between her legs, to her ass. “Baby,” I mouth the word into her ear, barely breathing. “Make it dirty,” she tells me.

I slipped my hand under her skirt and pulled the tight fabric over her ass. I pushed her feet further apart. “Back your ass up against me,” I said and pushed my hand between her legs, “Piss on my fingers.”

I waited. I traced a finger against her lace panties, “Soak them,” I said. I felt her hot piss on my cold skin. I heard it splash against the sidewalk. Pulling her panties to the side, I let her feel my hand in the wet stream. I stood behind her, looking down at her heels, my shoes, her bare legs, my trousers, the growing puddle of piss beneath us.

I thought about how cold her cunt must feel. Wet in this cold air. I rubbed my hand inside her thighs, painting her with piss. I wanted her skin to pick up the cold air like an antenna. I wanted to feel her shudder with cold. I kissed her ass and pinched the soft, sweet flesh. Pinching the backs her thighs. Twisting her skin in my fingers until I heard her softly wince.

I pulled her wet panties down to her knees and dragged the back of my hand up inside her thigh until I felt her wet hole and shoved three fingers inside her. I fucked her hard, quickly pumping in and out of her. I bit her ass with quick little nips of my teeth. My fingers. My hands. My mouth. My teeth. That’s all I wanted her to feel of me. Feel me on your ass, your thighs, inside your hole. I wanted her to feel the piss on her legs and the cold brick building that steadied her and feel herself being fucked.

“I’m not going to make you come,” I said, “I want to watch you.” I pulled out of her and grabbed her neck with my wet fingers. “Show me how dirty you are,” I said quietly, “I’m going to hold you still like this while you touch yourself.” I watched her lift a hand off the wall and twist it at the wrist. She was cold and stiff. “Warm your fingers in you mouth,” I said and a hot desire ripped through me as I watched her suck one finger and then another. Slowly. Teasing me. Showing me. My mouth was open. Wanting to taste her. “Do it, baby,” I said, trying to sound demanding but knowing it came out like a plea.

With her fingers warmed, she started to jerk off. I kept my hand on her neck and pushed against her ass. She came before I was ready, before I wanted it to end. “Again,” I said and she nodded. “Again,” she said.

She came two more times before we stepped back to the sidewalk. I pulled her piss soaked panties all the way off before we walked away and carried them hanging from my fingers. They were gone by the time we got to the car. I’d dropped them somewhere and hadn’t noticed with my cold, stiff fingers. “Your panties are gone,” I said, opening the door for her. She just smiled at me. Pleased.

She held her hand on my thigh while I drove us home, petting me. I love the dreamy feeling that comes. We held that dream the whole drive. Held it when we got inside. “Come to bed dirty,” I said. She undressed and climbed under the covers with me. It was a good feeling.

We Fuck Because We Are Fucked

elust #87

Photo courtesy of Understanding Flutterby

Welcome to Elust 87

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #88 Start with the rules, come back November 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

On Secret Identities

Dividing lines…

Ember and Ash

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

Bdsm: Our pleasures are our obligations


~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

Change your Cookbook: a monogamuggle’s guide to cookin’ with poly folk

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

When Love is not enough.
the fantasy and reality of my arrival


Shine a Light

Sex News, Opinion, Interviews, Politics & Humor

When You’re Bad
How Women Use Their Sexuality As A Weapon
Dear Fans: Quit Kinkbashing

Erotic Fiction

Big Daddy
The Front to Back Challenge
GAME OF TWO HALVES – role shift
no. 106

Erotic Non-Fiction

He’s Cumming
Washing up
Chew Toy
So many friends with benefits


One Stroke
Early Morning Haikus


ELust Site Badge


Sticky hot night in Oakland

It’s sticky hot in Oakland tonight but I’m remembering colder weather. A thick fog rolling in over the hills and wet, grey air calling us out onto the deck just before dusk. We’re enveloped in it. A cloud cover all our own. Relieved to be hidden from the nagging neighbors and their constant annoyance at our late night drinks with friends and loud laughter.

My hands reach around her as soon as we’re on the deck. I find her buttons and pull, one by one, slipping them out of their tight little button holes, finding her belly under the stiff cotton of her shirt. Not satisfied, not stopping, my fingers slide into her jeans and one hand moves between her shoulder blades. I bend her towards the deck railing. “Grab it,” I say and her arms steady herself against the wet wood.

I shove my hand between her legs, leaving her soft panties between my fingers and her pussy. I feel the stiff pricking of her short, trimmed pubic hair through the satin.

Holding her like this, seeing her bent over in front of me, my pants get tight. I shove myself up against her ass. I grab at her tits through her bra, pulling and twisting the fabric out of my way. I grab her with rough hands. Squeeze her between my fingers. I rub my hand against her panties until her pussy and my fingers are wet.

“Breathe,” I say out loud. This is for me. For me to remember to breathe and not suck it all in and hold tight and pass out. I have to be reminded to let go or I stay tight. Sucked in. Stiff. Red faced. I’m a balloon about to pop. I have to remember to vibrate and bend just enough to relax into this.

“Let me fuck you,” I say into the back of her neck. My hands undo her jeans and roll them down her thighs. I feel how strong she is and the contrast of thick muscle against her soft skin. I rub the backs of her thighs and slap her ass as I move my hands up and down, up and down. Slap. “Let me fuck you,” I say without needing to. She always lets me fuck her. She tells me all the time. She says, “Do whatever you want.” She taunts me with it when I’m lazy, “You know you can fuck me whenever you want, right?,” she says, “How does that feel?”

“Let me fuck you,” I say a third time and slap her ass hard. “Do it already,” she cries. My fingers are inside her before she shuts up. “Fuck you,” I say, “You act like you don’t care.” I wrap one arm around her to hold on while I slam my fingers inside her as hard as I can and I keep right on talking. “You act like a whore, never caring what I do to you. Like you can take it or leave it. Like you can get it anywhere, anytime you want.” I stop for a moment. Her breathing is hard and I can feel her legs shake, maybe from the cold, maybe the rush of a quick, angry fuck.

I twist and feel myself inside her. Let it build. Build to a strong, hard fuck. “It’s true. You can, baby. You can get it anytime you want. You can get it from anyone. You can throw your legs open and let them fuck you. Drunk. Stumbling to the bedroom. Stumbling to get on top of you. Fumbling with their almost hard dicks in their hands. You can get them with that flash of your ass or your tits. They can smell your pussy from across the bar, right? Did they see you bend over to pick up the dropped quarters before you put your money in the jukebox?”

I shove myself inside her hard. Harder than before but slower, with more intent and a steady rhythm. “You can get it, baby. Anytime. You can have that. But it’s not what you want.” Slower. “I know you, baby.” My thumb brushes against her clit.  “You like it pretty.” I press my lips against her back. “You like it pretty and you hate yourself for it.” I kiss her back. “You move your hips against me and I know how good you feel.” I hold her tight. My fingers inside her and my thumb rubbing her clit. We’re so wet between us. I can feel our sweat and the chill of the fog all around us. She pushes against my fingers. I hold her and let her ride against my hand.

“You’ve got to be quiet,” I whisper and her moan rises up from low in her belly. “Be quiet, baby,” I hush. She rides. We are twisted together. I hold on tight and whisper sweet things to her. “Come for me,” I sigh, “You’re my girl.”

She shudders so sweetly.

My girl.

I can do whatever I want to her. She let’s me fuck her.